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Where this card falls flat is definitely its scaling

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(This card is also still a Trap Card.) During your Standby Phase, while this card is treated as a monster: You can banish any number of "Utopia" monsters with different names from your GY

Whenever a creature receives damage, it sticks around on the creature until the end of the turn, so it's possible to slowly kill a creature by dealing damage several times during a turn

Theres virtually no chance of a card thats out of print decreasing in value over time

Bag End Porter can be fine in some decks that need a potent attacker